Love of a grandmother

There are precious souls that have bestowed tremendous treasures in my life. These treasures have no monetary value but are gifts that will last a lifetime. They leave a legacy that will continue to remain long after they have gone to reap their rewards.

My grandmother is 98 today and although her body is worn out and her mind is not what it once was she still has the radiance that makes up my mamma. I have always had a deep endearment to her. My grandmother lived in what is commonly called a shotgun house. If a person shot through the front door, the bullet would go straight through to the back door. When I was younger, we did not live in the same town and I loved coming to see her. I was a young dumpling of a thing and when it was time for us to leave I would make a u turn back into the front door and shoot like a bullet to the back of the house. I did not want to leave her. I felt safe with her, I felt loved and accepted, even when she swatted my backside for not behaving. I always knew I deserved it when she did it. The majority of the time it was the tone of her voice and the looks she gave that made me abide by the rules.

I speculate at times if a part of me knew that she was destined to be such a colossal part of my existence.

At some point between the sunrise and the sunset of my 15^th and 16^th year, I moved in with my grandmother and stayed. There were accumulations of events that lead to this decision. Although there are times, I would want to alter some of the misfortunate events I never wanted to change the fact that I was with her.

Mamma taught me innumerable lessons in life.  A few were by the words she would vocalize to me. Some of those words were harsh and at the time I may not have believed I needed them. Looking back over the years, I needed them as much as I did her love. The most bountiful of lessons she taught me was through her actions. The instructions she gave just by watching her live from day to day.

In my darkest hours, she showed me what it meant to be loved unconditionally. She was always my rock. She taught me what having faith truly was. There have been times since then I have forgotten that lesson then I think about her and marvel at the faith she had. My grandfather died when my mamma was in her 40’s. She would always say, “Why would I want another man when I already had the best?” Being a widow at such a young age put her at a disadvantage but she did not let that stop her.  She had her angels that swooped down and helped her out and she went from there. She stood her ground and never backed down. She had a rifle and was not afraid to use it. She told me about a drunken man that came up to her fence. He told her he wanted to talk turkey with her. My grandmother went and got her gun, pointed it at him and told him she was fixing to talk turkey to him. In her seventies I saw her pull a rifle on a man for beating me. She never backed down when she knew she was right.                                   Money was scarce but she always managed with Gods grace to have what she needed and even what she wanted. She worked hard around that home and the acres of land she owned. My grandmother taught me how to work a garden, gather huge logs, saw them up, and chop them with an axe. I mastered the art of making some of the best fires in those old wood burning stoves she had. I learned how to make sure the pipes did not freeze in the winter. If they did freeze what needed to happen so they would thaw out quickly. You also always need to be prepared with extra water just in case they did freeze. She helped me wash my hair and take baths plenty of times from heated up water and in turn, I did the same for her. It is nice to know how to flush a toilet when you do not have water. Even nicer to know you can fix a toilet if you have to. My grandmother could sew past the best of them. From doll clothes to wedding dresses to coats she made everything and all things made she put her best in. That woman was gifted. When her eyesight became so bad that it was hard for her to see to sew it broke my heart. It would be nice to say I inherited that gift but I did not. I am grateful for what I did get from her, whether it is by lessons or inherited genes.  My grandmother taught me the art of canning and drop biscuits, pinto beans, and the best dewberry cobblers that ever melted in your mouth! I do not think my crust will ever compare to hers or my moms! I will take satisfaction in knowing she tried!

There would never be a chance of me defining for you all that my mamma has been for me. I wish I could have conveyed it better to her before she became in the state of health that she now is.

We all have our allotment of time here on earth. Our lives lead us or take us down one winding road after another. The best we can do is keep moving our feet. No matter if we are trudging or running. We will all make a difference in each other’s lives. I guess the question we need to ask ourselves is if it will be for the betterment of someone. Will we be able to show that unconditional love when it needs to be shown. Can we step up and help others who desperately need it?

My mamma isn’t who she once was. She does still possess that twinkle in her eye the light that shines forth from her. I have had people comment about that light in my eyes. If I only received, a glimmer of what she has I know my grandmother will remain forever a part of me and maybe one day if I am fortunate to have a grandchild I will see that sparkle in their eyes as well.